Jan 31 2012


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Beware! Student Driver

Yesterday I was driving and I noticed a car ahead of me that looked like it was dressed up to be in a parade.  As I got closer to the car, I realized the car was inundated with advertising, and around 200 yellow stickers.  The advertisements were for a driving school.  The 200 yellow stickers indicated that the individual operating this particular motor vehicle was indeed a student driver.  This small white car had so many yellow stickers; you would have thought it was an oversized marshmallow peeps-mobile.

This is what your car would look like with 200 yellow stickers.

I wondered if the driving school was so desperate for advertising its business OR were they warning drivers that this student driver is one of the worst drivers on the road.  The traffic light ahead turned red and everyone started to slow down.  I was the car directly behind the new driver.

Light turns green.

New driver doesn’t budge.

I patiently wait.

New driver doesn’t budge.

As I placed my hand on the horn ready to give the universal sound that, “you are an idiot,” new driver bolts forward.  Picture a yellow drag car taking off at the start of a race.  I move forward and all of a sudden, new driver slams their brakes, and stops in the middle of the road.  This time I do sound the idiot horn, and new driver slowly moves forward.  I realize that it’s imperative that I pass this new driver and get away as fast as possible.  I signal and merge into the left lane to make my escape. 

New driver swerves into the left lane…my lane.  No signal.  No brake lights.  Nothing…just swerves into the left lane.  Great!  Today must be blind spot day and I’m the guinea pig.  Lucky me!  I slow down and merge into the right lane.  Yes, I’m going to pass this blind spot bandit in the right lane.  I make my pass, look over, and make eye contact with the driving instructor.  I wish I were a poet.  Then I could justifiably describe the fear and embarrassment on this man’s face.  He didn’t look happy.  As I was passing the 200 yellow sticker car, the driving instructor looked at me, and mouthed the words, “Help Me!” 

I gave a smile and laughed to myself.  Poor dude.  What did you do to find yourself in that situation?  Talk about bad karma…

When you date the owner’s daughter, you gain a false sense of confidence and arrogance.

When you gain a false sense of confidence and arrogance, you make fun of your supervisor.

When you make fun of your supervisor, your supervisor holds a grudge forever.

When the owner’s daughter dumps you, your supervisor becomes very happy.

When your supervisor is a very happy holder of grudges, you end up in a yellow sticker car teaching one of the worst drivers on the road about blind spots.

Don’t end up in a yellow sticker car….Don’t date the owner’s daughter. 

I would rather end up in a roadside ditch than be in that 200 yellow sticker car.


© 2012, Iric. All rights reserved.

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